Fatality waiting outside their front doors. COVID-19 and 'normalizing' death.

In COVID times living in a bigger city is kind of the equivalent to accepting the fact that government set regulations (social distancing and quarantining) WILL NOT be taken as seriously as it should by EVERYONE. Living in an area that is super compact in terms of population, there is always going to be someone in the crowd who just autonomously decides that the rules don’t apply to them. Recently, I couldn’t help but notice, the amount of elderly people strolling nonchalantly down the streets and sidewalks, in the shopping malls and, in the crowded metros. Even if these government regulations and guidelines have been put in place that doesn’t stop the elderly french population from smoking their cigarettes whilst casually chatting with their friends on a busy street corner, bearing no sign of a mask, and pretty much just acting like life has gone back to normal.

Since all research and statistics show that COVID deaths are specifically prevalent within the elderly age group, wouldn’t you assume that they would be walking around the city in some kind of Hazmat suit?! or is that just me? I know for a fact that if I was part of this age group during these times I would be constantly anxious about whether or not I’ve contracted the virus. An unconsciously made gesture such as touching your face after holding a basket at the supermarket can mean the difference between life and death for some people who are “at-risk”. If I were over sixty, I imagine my daily routine including but not limited to non-stop application of hand sanitizer and in other words, just acting straight up PARANOID 24/7! This highlights the kind of attitude I had towards the beginning of this pandemic. Now that multiple months have passed I contemptuously admit that my level of caution has slowly died down. Is this how the elderly feel as well? As humans, we are social beings we aren’t built for this kind of lifestyle. Grandparents being banned from seeing their grandchildren, families not being able to go to their loved ones' funerals, having birthday and dinner parties over zoom calls (I even know someone who had there wedding over zoom…). This also makes me wonder how the elderly have been dealing with potential mental health issues that have been propelled by the virus, a dangerous threat to their lives.

Just to put everything into perspective it is September 15th and the last three days here in Paris have hit record numbers for the amount of daily recorded COVID cases in France. Despite the numbers, it doesn’t seem to discourage the elderly to go out without precautions. Do they feel like they’ve had enough time here on Earth, do they believe that everything happens for a reason so they just continue to live their lives like normal? That’s when I dug deeper and asked myself how does my generation (and other young humans) view death differently than elders? I’ve read articles that interviewed the elderly in the french capital and from their words, it seems like they are rather nonchalant about it all, and have quite a matter of fact attitude. One quote from a Grandmother in a nursing home interviewed last month by Euronews reads, “When you get old, something has to kill you.” Instead of seeing the virus as something that can viciously attack their respiratory system and cause a fatal outcome, they see it as just another thing added on the long list of things that can ultimately cause their death. Yes it’s true the older you get the more fragile and frail you become but I guess I have never thought about it as elders being at the point in their life where they have accepted and come to the fact that our time and existence is truly finite. Is this the mindset that comes along with growing old? Death is not a comfortable topic and no one truly wants to ponder about the day when their moment of existence is over.

I babysit a five-year-old boy and at the most random moments he’ll just bring up the topic of death, stating that he ‘never ever ever EVEEEEEER wants to die’ and that he wants to ‘live forever and ever ever ever’. Those are his own words. At the age of five, he already has a fear of death growing on his back. He tells me how badly he wishes to be mortal and his hopes for an afterlife. Being born and then eventually dying is something that every single human being on this planet has in common no matter who you are.

On the other hand I 100% agree that living in a current state of fear and paranoia IS NOT how we should spend our moments here on Earth! No matter what your age is. For crying out loud it’s been seven months since lockdown and it is a human desire and physical need for us to crave socialization and human interaction. This human instinct doesn’t magically disappear after the age of 60. Even if the elderly can’t get around as easily the way they used to, or be as witty clever, and mentally sharp as when they were 30 or so does not mean they should stay cooped up in their homes all day in isolation. COVID or NO COVID.

Even though the elderly are statistically speaking already labeled as one of the loneliest age groups, they are still being encouraged to stay home and of course maintain their distance if they have to leave their house for “essential purposes”. I’ve learned a lot of things about myself and about the way we function as humans during this pandemic. However, the most valuable thing I’ve learned was that maybe once we are older we peacefully come to terms with the fact that we all indeed DIE. We no longer try to avoid discussing it, treating it like a taboo topic or straight-up acting like our death is light-years away. Needless to say, this doesn’t change the fact of how difficult it is to permanently say bye to our loved ones but eventually gathering enough wisdom, life experiences, and acceptance in our minds to be at peace with it.